These guidelines are presented in an effort to help people who are being stalked or fear they might be stalked. We provide no guarantee that following these guidelines will remove this threat from your life, but we hope that they will help most people in this situation. You are free to share these guidelines with others or refer them to this site.

For futher information, you might wish to check out our links page related to violence prevention. Other sources of help might include: local rape crisis centers, women's shelters, police and sheriff's departments.

If you are stalked, it is a good idea to take action. Often, this means actively not acknowledging any contact the stalker initiates with you. Taking action does not necessarily mean direct confrontation with the stalker. Stalkers want to act in stealth and take control of your life. This is potentially dangerous to you and your family. In general, it is better to act as soon as you suspect someone is stalking you; the longer you wait, the worse the situation can get. We recommend consulting experts in this area so that you can best eliminate this unwanted attention.

• Take civil action
• Obtain a protective order from the courts. Be aware that such protective orders do not always work and should be part of a larger strategy to combat this problem
• Record all contact by the stalker whether it is by phone, email, mail, in person or other modes of communication
• Report all incidents to the police
• Enlist the help of family and friends
• Change your phone number. Better yet, get a second phone line.
• Relocate
• Consult experts that have dealt with this issue before

• Have no contact with the stalker
• If the stalker initiates contact, firmly set a strong boundary and leave the vicinity. Use clear language that leaves no possible misinterpretation such as: “Go away.” “Leave”. “Do NOT contact me again.” Avoid “or” statements such as “go away or I’ll ....”
• If the stalker sends you something, keep it stored in a bag for possible evidence if you press charges
• Show no emotion to the stalker. Don’t get angry, upset or show other emotions as this can encourage the stalker to continue.
• Keep a cellular phone with you at all times in case of emergency.
• Use an answering machine to screen your calls. Don’t answer until you know it is not the stalker.
• If the stalker calls by phone, inform the phone company. It is a crime to use the phone in this manner. Do not respond to the stalker's attempts to communicate.
• If you think your mail is being tampered with, inform the police and postal service. This is a federal crime.
• Travel with others when possible.
• Inform family members, friends, neighbors, co-workers, employers of the situation.
• It is important to have other witnesses to the incidents. If possible, show them a photograph of the stalker.
• Don’t give out personal information and inform your family to do the same. If you have children, inform schools, day care etc. of the situation.
• If you think the stalker is in your home, leave immediately. Call the police. Do not try to confront the stalker.
• If you fear you are being followed in your car, drive somewhere where there are people. Do not lead the person to your home.
• To determine if you are being followed you can try making 4 right hand turns or 4 left hand turns in a row and see if the car(s) still follow you. Another option is to make a turn suddenly and see if you the suspicious car makes the same sudden turn. Don't break the law but stay safe.

• Defend yourself and get away. It is OK to make a plan to defend yourself . You have the right to defend yourself.
• Stalkers do not want attention drawn to themselves so attract attention to what’s happening. You can make noise. Try to find people to help you and also who might then be witnesses to the incident.
• If you need to physically defend yourself, make each technique count. Wait for the proper opening.
• Take a self defense class or two. Maybe follow this training up with martial arts training.
• Protective Devices only work if you have them ready and in your hand. Options include pepper spray, a heavy aluminum flashlight, whistles, firearms etc. You can keep a heavy flashlight in various locations for easy use including: your car, near the front door, in your bedroom.
• Remember any protective device can be used against you. If you decide to carry a protective device, get training in its safe and effective use. Find out local laws regarding such weapons.

• Write down each incident of contact, what happened and when
• Report each incident to the police
• Consult with your local DA regarding prosecution options and state statutes related to stalking
• If possible keep tapes from answering machine or tape recorder documenting phone calls
• Take photographs of the person if they are in your vicinity
• Make notes of license plates of car(s), physical description of car and of person(s)
• Hire an Expert to Help You